Paris Hilton, Wendy's and the Aliens

Ok, no more feeling sorry for myself and no more crying about how worthless I am. A wise man recently wrote "if you have nothing to say, say nothing". I have been trying to adhere to that but the truth is I do have a lot to say. I am going to stop worrying whether or not my opinion should count for anything to anyone - because this is my blog. If people read it, great. If not, I get my regular dose of get-it-off-my-chest therapy.

I had to wait a little while for the whole media smorgasbord that was the Paris Hilton "incarceration" to blow over before I could process my thoughts on the issue. I am completely sickened by just about everything surrounding this case. I still can't believe there weren't riots in Los Angeles over what went down.

Sheriff Lee Baca first tries to send Paris Hilton home on Day 3 of what was supposed to be a 45-day sentence (which had already been reduced to 23-days for "good behavior". I would think you would have to be REALLY good over the course of a couple days to get treatment like that!). The reason? A medical condition. The medical condition? Being a rich celebrity. Depending on what reports you read the actual affliction was either a rash, Attention Defecit Disorder, or depression. Are you kidding me? I honestly could not believe it when I heard the reason for Sheriff Baca's "compassion".

There were riots in LA over the Rodney King beating (somewhat understandable). There probably would have been riots in LA if O.J. Simpson had been found guilty (completely silly). I simply can not believe the people of Los Angeles, chiefly those in minority groups with family members incarcerated in L.A. County jails, sat silently while a rich celebri-tard was allowed to leave jail under the cover of darkness. The people of Los Angeles have gotten soft. Can you imagine if you could get home confinement for any county prisoner with a rash, ADD or who might be bummed that they are in jail? I guess that is one solution to prison overcrowding. If I lived in L.A. and had family in jail (a good possibility given my family) I would not have taken this slap in the face laying down.

I have no idea why I still allow certain things to make me crazy but I can definitely say that I have now seen the worst advertising campaign in the history of the free market economy. The current campaign for Wendy's includes two of the worst commercials I have ever seen. Ever. In the whole of television advertising these are the most abhorrent that I can remember. Those of you who know me realize I like fast food. I really like Wendy's. They at least give you hope that you are eating real meat. However, I will not eat at Wendy's again any time soon. The commercials make me that angry. I thought the Burger King commercials with a giant Howard Eskin standing outside people's bedroom windows holding breakfast sandwiches were creepy, but these commercials are worse. Much worse. I would normally include a You Tube link but I feel I would be doing Wendy's a favor. The first commercial involves a large group of people in the woods kicking trees. One has a red ponytail wig and leads the tree-kickers into a chant of "hot juicy burger" or something. The second commercial contains another jackhole in the same wig looming over a city where crude cut-outs of screaming young girls (screaming as if it were the 60's and the Beatles just arrived) with old man faces are running amok. They are both annoying. I believe in rewarding clever advertising. I also believe in punishing brutally bad advertising. Will one man's abstinence from the Big Bacon Classic value meal make any difference? Probably not, but I will sleep at night with a clear fast-food conscience.

If any of the people quoted in this story are to be believed, none of the above really matters. Are we alone in the universe? After reading this article a couple of weeks ago, I am thinking not. I have read a zillion alien articles but for some reason this one creeped me out big time. Apparently there was a mass UFO sighting in Arizona in 1997. The story was actually covered by ABC News and the incident is known as the "Phoenix Lights". Government officials claimed the craft, described by onlookers as V-shaped with a visable length of 5000 feet, was a military test aircraft. The incident was witnessed by thousands of people in Arizona, and while this took place over a decade ago, the thought of a possible alien intelligence flying 5000-foot craft in our atmosphere is somewhat troubling. Here's hoping they are nice, that they bring peaceful solutions to the problems of man, and they are here to take the advertising execs behind the Wendy's ad campaign back with them.

[Currently Listening: Kanye West - "School Spirit Skit 2"]