Salad of Death and the New Crusades

In a week where eating multiple fast-food value meals for dinner is better for you than a spinach salad, one does not have to look very far to see how topsy-turvy life can get sometimes.

I have always been a live and let live type. My general philosophy has been one of tolerance, attempted understanding and friendship. I have never allowed anyone's background, appearance, race, religion or sexual preference keep me from getting to know them. Life is short. With so little time on the planet, I believe that people should be allowed to pursue peace and happiness in whatever way they see fit, as long as that pursuit does not hurt others.

The Muslim furor over comments attributed to the Pope last week has accomplished two things in my life. First, it re-opened my eyes to the big picture. Secondly, it has somewhat damaged my worldview. I, like many others around the world, have been more than wary of the current Administration running our country. The conspiracy theorist in me has many questions about both of Prez Dubbya's election "victories", strange events/occurrences surrounding the 9/11 terror attacks, the brazen unchecked price-gouging performed by the oil industry, the marriage of the Republican party and the religious right... I am convinced that all of it is leading to something big. I strongly believe that the current administration has no plans to hand over power at the end of their eight year, two-term limited run.

Historically, fascists seeking seizure of power have needed a cause to rally behind. Most revolutions have had flashpoint events that have given those seeking to create change the momentum needed to achieve their goals of upheaval. It is obvious that Dubbya has done everything in his power (and then some) to foster an attitude of fear in this country. Fear of Muslims. Fear of terrorism. Fear of Saddam. Fear of Mexicans. Fear of everything except what we should REALLY be fearing (i.e. the fascist takeover of our nation, global warming, big business running unchecked, the rampant devolution of our inner cities, etc.). Last week it became apparent to me that the right-wing uber-caucasoid-Christian movement is getting exactly what they want. For years I have assumed that the support of the ignorant redneck red state bloc was what would carry this regime forward. Now, they are getting help from abroad in the form of the Pope and the very people we are supposed to fear, the knee-jerk reacting way-too-over-the-top Islamic radicals/protesters.

Last week, there was another outcry from the Muslim world over comments made by the Pope during a speech in which he condemned violence in the name of religion. Many Muslim leaders called for a Vatican apology, while other Islamic protesters firebombed churches and other Christian-affiliated buildings. After reading the transcript of the Pope's speech, I could see where some of it could be interpreted as scathing. In fact, by referring to bloodshed carried out in the name of Islam while refusing to acknowledge atrocities committed by Christians along the same vein, the speech comes across as a bit hypocritical. The overall theme of the speech, as I interpret it, is that violence and religion have zero business mingling with one another. This is a theory I subscribe to wholeheartedly.

What the Muslim (over)reactions to the cartoons and the Pope's speech do is put people on edge. They are painting themselves as a people unable to take criticism, unable to be rationalized with and worse of all unable to be coexisted with. Do I believe all Muslims should be painted in this light? No, I do not. I feel badly for everyday Joe Muslim, whose religion's leadership and higher-profile brethren make him out to be a proponent of violence at the merest hint of insult. Scarier still is the general unbending nature of religious philosophy. The Catholic Church has archaic stances that it adheres to even in the face of mass exodus from its pews worldwide. While there are different sects of Islam, most of them still view all non-Muslims as infidels, and would like nothing more than the complete annihilation of Israel (another view for another day).

I honestly believe that the current leadership administration of the United States would like nothing more than for the Muslims to continue scaring the West with its violent protests, proclamations of intent to see a world dominated by Islam and terrorist attacks. I do not believe that terrorists represent the bulk of the Islamic world, but we will see how many mass street demonstrations/celebrations there are after the next round of terror attacks. By flipping out every time Islam is criticized or actually insulted, the Muslims push towards conflict, a conflict those in the American religious right can't wait to see.

Should push come to shove - and I truly believe that we continue to push the Muslim world. I liken American handling of the Islamic world to a dog trainer who gleefully pokes an angry doberman with a long stick until it finally snaps and tries to gnaw through the Stay Puft marshmallow man training suit - an all-out conflict between Muslims and the West will serve a plethora of purposes for the agenda of our powerful married American couple consisting of rich Republicans and the religious right. First, it allows the current administration to put a stranglehold on power using the impending "World War III" as its excuse. It allows Big Oil to jack up prices due to "supply issues" stemming from the volatile situation in the Middle East. It kicks any Red State wavering support right back in line as we become the champion of Christianity and we send our armies over to fight against the rampaging hordes of "godless" Muslims...

So, how does all of this change my world view? I do not judge anyone by what they believe. I judge them on how they act. Right now, the Muslim world is acting and reacting with methods of protest that are simply uncalled for. Much of the Muslim world continues to repress its female population. How many of the world's problems might have been solved by untold amounts of brilliant minds kept from the rest of the world because of "religious" beliefs that do not allow women to study, speak or be seen? So, it is with that (and more) in mind when I say that if a conflict were to arise, that my support would be on the side of those who are at the very least indirectly provoking it - America, the religious right, the West and Christendom. Should it come down to a choice between us and them, I choose us.

I choose to be free (as free as we are allowed to be, anyways), to have the illusion of being able to choose the leadership of my country, to serve a system that caters to Big Business and the rich at the expense of the only habitat our species has to live on... Why? Because the alternative is even scarier. I am a Christian. I am a proud American (I will be prouder when we evolve as a people to realize that democracy and free market economy are not the same thing), and while I feel our system could be tweaked some in order to make it better, I still believe in its core values. I do not believe it is right to repress women. I do not believe it is right to burn embassies in response to the publishing of political satirical cartoons. I do not believe that religion and government should EVER intermingle. I am a Caucasian Christian who is deathly afraid of the Caucasian Christian movement that is openly trying to take over our country. Give me true separation of church and state. Give me true separation of religion and violence. That is when the world will become a much better place.

[Currently Listening: Marc Cohn - "Healing Hands"]

Worst Construction Crew Ever

There is a road paving project taking place on the street my job is located on in West Chester. This is a good thing, as the street was in abysmal shape. I was happy that I would no longer have to travel along pothole hell multiple times every day.

The crew has been at it for a few weeks now, and I am left to wonder if this is their virgin undertaking. The first thing I noticed about the road crew was that none of them used flags or wore the bright-colored garb that I had previously assumed was mandatory for traffic control teams. The second thing I noticed was the one "flag" guy looked like a shorter, heavier version of Jelly from Analyze This. Four days and 14-or-so trips past this individual later I would realize that this individual was actually a woman. Scary-looking individuals aside, the crew seemed to be struggling with the management of traffic flow during the first couple of weeks, but I didn't believe that anyone's life was in danger.

Yesterday, I pulled out of our office park and waited for the now bright-yellow vest wearing man on the walkie-talkie to wave me onto the street. I am guessing there was a bit of a miscommunication, because shortly thereafter I was face-to-face with an oncoming UPS truck with nowhere to go. Today, as I left the office to pick up some lunch, there were no flag-wavers to be seen. I saw equipment and flashing lights a half-mile to my left and proceeded to turn right. This time upon traveling around the bend I had a line of vehicles led by a monstrous dump truck threatening a head-on collision. I swerved onto the freshly-paved side of the asphalt to the chagrin of the fine fellows who had recently smoothed that stretch of road. Some of them waved their flags at me and others screamed. After pelting the undercarriage of my car with fresh asphalt granules, I pulled over to the "safe" side of the road to address the gentlemen that were cursing at me. I was less than cordial in my suggestion that they spend less time yelling at me and more time getting their flag-waving system corrected. Three of the men approached my car and one asked "what the bleep are you gonna do about it?". In past days, I may have leapt from the car and beaten the guy to death with his own hard hat. However, I simply replied "nothing. I'll just call OSHA". My response ended the discussion.

I am supposed to run to the printer sometime this afternoon, but I'm wondering how wise that is. I have rolled the dice with my life a couple of times over the past couple of days, and I'd rather not take a Mac truck to the face while running an errand.

[Currently Listening: Da Backwudz - "I Don't Like the Look Of It"]

The Biggest Loser?, One Crazy Week

I have been trying to find the time to write all week and have been thwarted at every turn. Work has been nuts, and the evenings haven't lent themselves to much writing time either.

Last weekend was up and down, mostly down. Had cards at my house Saturday night and I did not play well. I continued my pattern of starting well, generating a big stack, then wondering later what happened to my chips. I am usually very in tune with what I am doing right and wrong at the table, but my last couple of losing sessions have left me scratching my head. Bought in the tourney two and two-thirds times (to the tune of $80) and built the big stack each time. Then, each time, I got zapped. Crazy game, poker. I still love it though.

Another thing I love is my new t.v. I had been bringing myself to the brink of an anxiety attack as I debated whether or not to get the new set. I have never been much of a materialistic person. Growing up as a have-not, I am not used to having the option to get really nice things. Regardless of how much I work I still find myself wrestling with immense guilt over spending money on things that aren't necessarily needed. I did some research (greatly aided by good friends Rob and Dave) and finally decided to get the new t.v. Neighbor Dan went with me (again to Delaware) and we picked up a 42" Samsung DLP. We hooked it up in time to catch some of the Notre Dame - Penn State game, and it looked fantastic. Still, I felt hollow over it. The money could have been used for bills or something more important. I would agonize about this all through the weekend, even after watching my first Eagles game on it. I missed the first quarter after agreeing late Saturday afternoon to meet my boss at the office for "two hours" on Sunday. This would prove later in the week to have been a major mistake.

Monday brought a slew of work-related craziness into my life. Things here have been tight lately, and the tension has been palpable. I have been asked to take on a lot of stuff in the way of special marketing projects and such (which I do not mind) but am still supposed to be handling my usual duties. My boss told me for coming in on Sunday I could take a half day later in the week (NOT a fair trade) but then gave me attitude when I told him I was taking it on Wednesday. Heard rumblings of internet usage monitoring so I began to be a lot more careful - not that I had much of a chance to jump on this week anyway. Got into a heated exchange with my boss when he took umbrage to my declaration for leaving early. I swear, this place is nuts. The company has been good to me at times, but it always comes at a price. Today (Friday) our new sales guy was let go. He wasn't taking care of business but it hit home when a young guy with a little baby at home lost his job. I got the shakes when I learned about it, but the Sales Mgr. pulled me aside and told me to be calm. He told me I was valuable to the organization, and that meant a lot. Still, with the company struggling a bit to make our sales goals and the slaughterhouse atmosphere that gets generated in the office a little too often, I need to keep my options open.

The Man Zachary had his one-month checkup on Wednesday and he is doing great. He is in the 95th percentile for noggin size, 95th percentile for height and the 90th for weight. The doctor tends to call him "Bubba" or "Bruiser". He got three shots and that is always hard. While knowing that it is necessary, I still struggle with seeing Zachary in pain. I need to toughen up.

I won the spread pool for Week 1. I picked 12-4 against the number and clinched when the Vikings beat the Redskins on Monday Night Football. Monday Night also assuaged my t.v.-related guilt. Watching the game on my couch on the widescreen was SO nice. I still have to squint some, but that is because I am a blind bastard. I watched the first quarter with my Dad at the hospital. He had his pacemaker put in and he is doing better. We had some laughs and I was glad to have been able to go see him. I also won all three of my money-league fantasy games, so that took some of the bitter poker taste from my mouth.

This week went by like a whirlwind. I am very much looking forward to this Sunday, and not just because of the Eagles game. I will be seeing some very good friends for the first time in ages at the Collelouri Crabfest. The DiMario and Collelouri familes were very good to me over the years. I cannot wait to see everyone, or for them to meet Kim and Zachary. I find myself wishing Zachary was a little more Italian looking, but I guess I can't have it all.

[Currently Listening: Young Dro - "I'm Rollin'"]

NFL Predictions 2006!

I am not sure why you should care what I think concerning the upcoming NFL season. Last year, my predictions were so far off as to bring into question my supposed knowledge of the game. I was feeling frisky last year, coming off a first-place finish in our 20+-person spread pool, and decent showings in my fantasy football leagues. So, I decided to blog my thoughts and predictions on the 2005 NFL. Turns out my newborn son could have predicted better than I did last year. Since I had my own office, I implemented a system of assigning wins and losses to every game on the upcoming schedule. This is not a very logical way to predict a season as it fails to take into consideration variables such as injuries, prima donna receivers stabbing their quarterbacks square between the shoulder-blades, etc. Some of my most egregious misses can’t even be pinned on these excuses. For instance, I completely overrated the Baltimore Ravens - as I turned them from dark horse contender to league juggernaut (with Kyle Boller at the helm no less), and predicted that the Chicago Bears would be one of the worst teams in recent NFL memory – even though I knew their defense was very good).

These are the types of things that should make you cease and desist reading this post – as I have about as much chance of being right as someone witnessing Mel Gibson head-bobbing at a Matisyahu concert. However, I will still undauntedly share my game-by-game playout prediction for the upcoming 2006 NFL season.

Here is what I foresee the final regular season standings looking like:
x = division winner. y = wildcard.

AFC EAST
NE 11-5 x
MIA 11-5 y
BUF 10-6
NYJ 3-13

AFC NORTH
CIN 11-5 x
PIT 10-6
BAL 5-11
CLE 4-12

AFC SOUTH
IND 12-4 x
JAX 10-6
HOU 3-13
TEN 3-13

AFC WEST
SD 12-4 x
DEN 11-5 y
KC 10-6
OAK 5-11

NFC EAST
NYG 11-5 x
DAL 10-6 y
PHI 10-6
WAS 6-10

NFC NORTH
MIN 10-6 x
CHI 10-6 y
DET 4-12
GB 4-12

NFC SOUTH
CAR 11-5 x
ATL 7-9
TB 6-10
NO 4-12

NFC WEST
SEA 12-4 x
ARI 8-8
STL 8-8
SF 3-13

So, the natural question I ask is: what looks way too loopy to happen? I don’t see any potential for uber-mistakes along the lines of the Ravens and Bears last year. I am torn on the NFC playoff picture. I believe the Wild Card spots in the conference will boil down to tiebreakers involving the Cowboys, Eagles and Bears, most likely conference record. In this scenario, the Cowboys and Bears eke out the two spots. I feel as though my Eagles can make the playoffs, but their second-half schedule is brutal. If they can manage to win a couple of those games at the end of the season that they aren’t supposed to, pencil them in. The most important game on the Birds’ schedule this season is Week 5, versus the Cowboys. It very well could determine their playoff fate.

Okay, if the above regular-season scenario plays out - the seedings for the playoffs would be: AFC: 1) Colts; 2) Chargers; 3) Bengals; 4) Patriots; 5) Broncos; 6) Dolphins. NFC: 1) Seahawks; 2) Panthers; 3) Giants; 4) Vikings; 5) Bears; 6) Cowboys.

WildCard Weekend: Dolphins at Bengals. Winner: Bengals; Broncos at Patriots. Winner: Patriots. Cowboys at Giants. Winner: Giants. Bears at Vikings. Winner: Bears.

Divisional Round: Patriots at Colts. Winner: Colts; Bengals at Chargers. Winner: Chargers; Bears at Seahawks. Winner: Seahawks; Giants at Panthers. Winner: Panthers.

Championship Games: Chargers at Colts. Winner: Colts; Panthers at Seahawks. Winner: Panthers.

Super Bowl: Is this the year for Peyton and the Colts? Maybe. The game will be outdoors, and that gives the toss-up to the Panthers. So there it is, the Carolina Panthers are your 2006 Super Bowl Champions.

(I am a big-time Eagles fan. I will be rooting for the Eagles every week. I believe the Eagles can make the playoffs as a high seed and win it all. But I do this exercise with my head, not my heart...)

[Currently Listening: Shaggy - "Oh Carolina"]

On the Hunt

Last night I dragged my next-door neighbor Dan on a quest through the unforgiving terrain of a foreign land. A land of mystery, fraught with peril, with danger lurking around every corner - made worth braving by the riches (or lack of sales tax) one can find if lucky enough to survive. Where did we trek last night, and why? Delaware. I am on the hunt for a new television.

Ideally, I would like a 37"-42" LCD HD widescreen set. I have a somewhat limited budget, so bargain-hunting is key. Seeing how I would pay $75.00 in sales tax at the very least if I bought in my homeland of Pennsylvania, the 30-minute odyssey to Delaware was more than justified. The first stop on our quest was an appliance outlet store in a place called Newark. We were not sure what to expect. The outlet store was very close to the off-ramp of US Interstate 95 South, a most treacherous path for a quest, thus we did not see much of Newark. We continue to assume that it is a dark, desolate land.

The store is housed in a warehouse, and my hopes rose as we entered. Alas, their entire inventory was comprised of returns - some damaged, some just cosmetically so. None of the sparse choices intrigued me much, so we jumped back in the Blazer and headed back due north to Best Buy.

We got to the second store with about 15 minutes left before closing. The model I had my sights set on was out of stock, which was good because we also found that it did not meet the specs of what I was looking for. I almost settled for a gorgeous 32" set (my current t.v. is a square 32" HD), but decided against it. While the trip to this point was very disappointing, I did see an old friend which boosted my spirits a ton. While I was looking at the beautiful wall of televisions, I heard a very familiar voice from up the aisle. I didn't turn around because I have a history of embarrassing mini-moments when my lack of good eyesight rears its ugly head. I turned around a few seconds later to see the smiling face of my fraternity brother Rashaan. He was always one of my favorite people in the fraternity, and it was awesome to see him, and to see that he is doing well.

Neighbor Dan and I were somewhat dejected that we were leaving Best Buy without a t.v., and Dan suggested a last-ditch stop at the nearby Target. After navigating through the most confusing parking lot ever constructed by man, we stopped in to check out the sets offered by the Target (tar-JAY) electronics department. It became apparent that if I am going to get a 37" or 42" t.v., I am going to have to spend a significant amount of money more than I initially budgeted. I can afford a more expensive set, but I like to have the missus on board for those types of decisions. She will most likely guilt me into a better decision with her legendary unwavering electronic frugality.

The trek to a foreign land to acquire a television last night bore no fruit. All we could take from the outing was some knowledge gleaned from the hobbit techno-geeks at the Best Buy and an enhanced awareness of ridiculous parking lot design. I had no new t.v. to bring home, but on the plus side I am not in the midst of divorce proceedings. We made it to this Newark place and back without being attacked by Delawarian orcs, and without settling for something I wasn't happy with for the next 10 years.

[Currently Listening: The Bouncing Souls - "True Believers"]

The Long Weekend That Wasn't Very

Last week I was very much looking forward to the long Labor Day weekend. It looked like there would be a lot of time to relax and hang out at home with my family, something we haven't done a whole lot of this summer. We had some cookout commitments which was nice, and I had a card game scheduled with the crew in Berwyn on Saturday night that I was eager to jump into. Friday night the missus and I had dinner and a movie planned. All-in-all it was lining up to be a most enjoyable weekend.

The weekend started off okay. I hustled home from work to hang out with the baby a little before we had to take him to my Mom-In-Law's for the night, and everything seemed okay. Hurricane/tropical storm/tropical depression Ernesto arrived early for some people in West Chester, however. We hadn't noticed any rain or wind gusts on the way over to drop The Man Zachary off, but less than a minute before we pulled into the MNL's driveway, a transformer exploded a few houses away, rendering her home powerless. She assured us that the lack of power would not impede her babysitting ability, so we were still off to the movies.

Believe it or not, I really wasn't all geeked up to see "Invincible". In fact, I am almost embarrassed to admit that going to see the movie was Kim's idea. Yes, the die-hard Eagles fan had to be convinced by his wife to see a sports movie based on his favorite team. I had no real expectations for this movie for a number of reasons. First, I hate the Hollywood-ing up of a true story for the purpose of a story translating to the big screen. "Invincible" is a Disney movie, and they are the biggest culprits of all. "Cool Runnings" was once one of my favorite movies. That is, until I researched the actual events surrounding the Jamaican bobsled team. Disney changed EVERYTHING, including the names of the Olympians! I am happy to report that the movie was very well-done, and I will up my sissy factor a few points by sharing that I even got a little weepy at the end. There were more than a few goosebump-inspiring moments, and I highly recommend this movie to any sports fan, but it is especially relevant to Philadelphia sports fans.

A few points of interest I gathered from the film: First, Philadelphia appears to have been a very depressing place in the mid-1970s. Second, Vince Papale should always be remembered in sports circles as one of Philadelphia's greatest sons. I don't want to ruin the movie for anyone that is unfamiliar with the story, but what he accomplished was truly incredible. I am still blown away by the magnitude of what he did. I can't see how this could happen today, but there was a similar story out of New Orleans when Michael Lewis made that team after a tryout and stint with an arena football franchise - also with no college playing experience - in 2001. I have always said that I would never cave in to the throwback jersey craze, but I just might have to order a #83 Eagles jersey, circa 1977.

We got to sleep in on Saturday, and this was needed after weeks of non-stop running around. We awoke to find that the power at my Mother-In-Law's would be out for a fairly long time. This did not bode well, as our Sunday family cookout commitment would now fall into our laps to host. Normally, this sort of thing doesn't bother me, but I was not in a hosting frame of mind. This lack of hospitality I was finding in myself would only be augmented by the events of the Saturday night poker game in Berwyn. It also wasn't helped by the 6 hours I had to put in to get my night job's monthly billing out the door, but I digress. Poker night was what really got to me. I began the night playing well. I had a good read on the table and was up pretty nicely early-on. Then, I flopped a monster hand and ran smack-dab into an even larger monster. I'll spare the details, but suffice it to say my heart wasn't into it as it should be with real money on the table. I ended up donating another $100 after losing the initial $50. This was inexcusable for me, as I knew on all three big hands that I lost that I was on the worse end of things. I played horribly and stupidly after the first hour and a half, and it cost me. This put me in a most foul mood heading into Sunday. I generally am able to handle a bad night of poker if I am outplayed or unlucky. On this particular night I was unfocused and stupid. Not a good combination when playing cards.

I was a complete sourpuss on Sunday. I was a little tired, I was annoyed with myself for giving away $100 the previous evening, and I wasn't feeling great physically. The cookout/family gathering went pretty smoothly, much better than I had expected. I feel guilty for not being my normal energetic welcoming self, but I don't know anyone who is "on" all the time.

Monday I went to my Dad's to continue helping him get his PC up to speed. My attempts to get my parents off and running with their first PC and internet access has me wondering if I could cut it as a teacher. I always thought I'd be a good teacher. Now, I wonder if I have the chops for it. Long story short, I ended up causing more problems on the machine than fixing, and in the meantime spent way more time than allotted for the visit. I was over a half-hour late to pick up my wife and son for a cookout we were supposed to be present for at 4pm. I didn't get home until 4:05pm and we had a nice half-hour trip in front of us to get to the festivities. Needless to say, the missus was miffed.

All in all, the weekend wasn't too bad, but there are a lot of things I could have/should have done to make it a lot more enjoyable. My first day back to work hasn't been bad so far, and for that I am grateful. Another thing I am grateful for is football. The NFL regular season kicks off this week and with it my favorite time of year. It means watching Eagles games, fantasy football, spread pools, suicide pools...(sigh!) I love football!

[Currently Listening: The English Beat - "Ranking Full Stop"]