Thursday, August 14, 2008

Summer Thoughts

I honestly cannot believe it is mid-August already. The summer is flying by. It has been so busy, I STILL haven't been able to sit down and write about my crazy jury duty experience from early June. But, since it completely blew my mind, embittered me to no end and turned me into a half-fascist it is probably best that I wait to share my thoughts. I am sitting in my hotel room in San Francisco right now as my soon-to-be three year old sleeps. I figured now is as good a time as any to put down some stuff I have been thinking this summer.

Flew out with the family yesterday for my Brother In Law’s wedding this coming Saturday. We came out early to do the tourist thing and we are off to a good start. Going into this, I was bitter about having to plunk down the cash to make the trip. That bitterness was doubled when I realized I was going to be spending my summer vacation in a climate that tops out at 75 degrees on the best day. Top it all off with the dread that comes with dragging a two year old cross-country and back (with layovers no less) and you can imagine I was less than enthused about this trip. I must say that money aside, I was wrong to be so negative San Francisco is a gorgeous city. I can see why the folks here are proud of their hometown. The Bay is beautiful, and I am having fun playing tourist with my family. One particular highlight is the sea lion congregation at Pier 39 on the Bay. They are a lot of fun, especially when they sumo wrestle one another pushing their sea lion buddies off the floating docks into the water.

Saw Dark Knight last Sunday night and all I can say is WOW. It is a great movie. I loved "Batman Begins" and was eager to see this one. The first batch of Batman movies never sat right with me. Especially when they got all neon-colored and uber-goofy. I remember standing in line with the Alessi brothers for six hours to see the Michael Keaton/Jack Nicholson original and coming out wondering what all the hype was about. I have no such complaints about 'Begins' or 'Dark Knight'. Christian Bale is more than solid, except for the deep gargling angry Batman voice. Not sure what that is all about. Heath Ledger was a fantastic Joker. Then again, he has been pretty good in everything he has done that I have seen. He will be missed. I really thought he was in line to be the next great actor. We saw the preview for Watchmen, an upcoming movie based on a poplar graphic novel. I am long removed from my comics days of the mid-eighties, and have never read the book. However, based on the preview alone I plan to check out the book and the movie.

I took my niece Gabby to see Wall-E earlier this summer and we both liked it a lot. She and I polished off a Blando family record for movie fare (and any of you who have gone to the movies with me know this is a feat) and had a blast. The movie was visually stunning. Critics who say the movie has a depressing subplot need to look around the world a bit. Pixar again hit a home run. We saw a downright disturbing preview for an upcoming Disney movie about a Chihuahua. Just what the world needs, another talking dog movie.

I got to go to training in Orlando for four days in mid-July and on top of learning a lot about human resources and benefits, I got to go to the Universal Studios CityWalk. I had never been to Orlando before, and the CityWalk was very impressive. Had dinner at Bob Marley's restaurant (food was okay) and had drinks at piano bar next door. The dueling piano players were having an off night, but I could see how it would be a pretty fun place. Apparently Orlando is the thunderstorm capital of the world during mid-July. It would also seem that a severe thunderstorm warning in central Florida has a completely different meaning then one in Southeastern Pennsylvania. My co-workers and I braved a wicked storm on our trip to Universal, and though we got soaked it was worth it. While Bob Marley's and the piano bar were so-so, the full rock band karaoke spot blew my mind. We didn't stay to check it out for long, but I fully plan to spend more quality time during the next visit. I don't know if the house band knew “21st Century Digital Boy” by Bad Religion, but I can dream.

My boss and a co-worker hazed me (I am new to the department) by making me wear a pair of garish Lilly Pulitzer elephant pants. They were brutal. However, I hate backing down so I wore them to the first night welcome dinner. People were afraid at first but I ended up winning them over. The fat man pulled it off, and would have knocked them out of the park if I had been able to find some white slip-on shoes in a size fourteen.

I learned during my Orlando trip that shot gunning dirty Grey Goose martinis can have seriously adverse effects on one's life. Seriously.

I have been watching a lot of the first week of Olympics coverage and while I enjoyed a lot of it there are some events that need to go away. Most of these events are ultra-athletic, but I just don't know that they are sports. First of all, synchronized swimming is creepy. Synchronized diving makes no sense. The mind reels when trying to figure out how synchronized diving turned into a sport, much less an Olympic event. “Dude, I’m going to dive. You dive too exactly like me!” That might be cool for a while at a drunken pool party, but where did the groundswell of support come for this Olympic movement? Gymnastics is another sport that bothers me to no end and earns a spot in my Most Annoying Sports pantheon along with figure skating. These "sports" are contested by great athletes, however, when any sport is decided solely by judges, it is not a sport anymore. It is a pageant. Boxing is not a pageant but it is another sport that needs some improvements. It is the only sport I can think of where no one, not the participants, the trainers, the spectators, have any idea what the score is. Like the sports listed above, this hidden scoring tallied by judges (see a theme here?) lends itself to controversy and shadiness.

Speaking of sports, I played on the company softball team this season and could not believe how far I have fallen as a player. I was one of the team’s better players, and played a really good first base. But with the exception of a few nice shots, I could not hit for any power. It probably didn’t help that I cracked ribs on my left side during our first game. I know, I am the only person who damages himself playing slow-pitch softball. Second at-bat of the season I hit a grounder in the hole on the left side, the third basemen fields it and fires a wide throw that misses on the home plate side of first. The idiot first baseman comes straight down the line to catch the ball and instead of lowering my shoulder and trucking the guy, I try to minimize contact. That is what I get for showing mercy.

I finally caved in and spent some money over the past few weeks to see a personal trainer. I have been heavier at various points of my life but I can say without a doubt that I am in the worst shape of my life. I stopped playing basketball because my body was breaking down. I figured with some time off, my injuries (foot, knee, back, elbow) would heal and I would get back on the horse, as it were. The exact opposite has happened. I feel worse than I do after dragging my fat arse up and down the court chasing fast twenty year olds for an hour. I have always been the type of person who hated conditioning, even when I was an athlete. However, once someone was keeping score, I turned in to a completely different person. Well, at 35, people are going to be keeping score a lot less. I need to get myself pulled together. On the first night, my trainer said we were going to work on my abs. I told him I didn’t think I had those anymore. I know I haven’t seen them since I was 19. However, after some medicine ball work it would appear he was right. They were in there somewhere, and they were angry.

Anger. An emotion Jimmy Rollins seems to have invoked in the Philadelphia sports “faithful”. Rollins had the nerve to suggest that Philly fans are the fair-weather type. I wrote about my fellow Philadelphia sports fans in this blog on October 23, 2006. If you take the time to read that piece, you will see that I agree whole-heartedly with J-Roll. Philly fans are the most negative fans in the country. The majority of Philly fans live to turn on local athletes and to be miserable in general. For too long we have hidden behind the excuse that we are SO hungry for a winner and the oft-used backhanded compliment that we are the most passionate fans in the country. As a former athlete, I can tell you that there is nothing like having a home crowd behind you. Positive support from the home crowd is what helps create home field advantage, and what can pull you through when you are struggling with your ame. J-Roll’s pronouncement last night is further proof that professionals in Philadelphia see through the passionate Philly fan charade. Kudos to Rollins for speaking his mind. He will probably reword his statement, and that would be a shame. Proponents of Philly fans turning on their own say that paying customers have the right to boo when a player is not performing. Well Philly, boo on. Just don’t complain as our championship drought continues.

[Currently Listening: Memphis Bleek – “Round Here”]